Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Another Shrimp and Veggie Summer Pasta

This one comes from Mom. So of course it's better than the last piece of crap shrimp pasta recipe I posted.  

You'll need:

Thin Spaghetti or Capellini noodles
Red/yellow/orange bells
Garlic Cloves
A lemon or two.
Shrimps. Big ones.  
Olive Oil
Block Parmesan or Romano

Slice up your Peppers long and skinny wise.  Chop the Zucchini into circles and wedges.  Throw it in a pan over medium/high heat with a tablespoon or two of olive oil.

Peel and mince a couple of cloves of fresh garlic.  Leave another couple of cloves peeled and chopped into large pieces (for the bread later)

When the peppers and zucchini have had their time in the heat...about 8 minutes...take them out into a large bowl. 

Put a tablespoon of olive oil and a half tablespoon of garlic salt in a large pot of boiling water. Add the noodles and cook using the wisdom and guidance of the directions on the package.  


Take your sorry store bought ciabatta from Kroger and slice it down the middle of each roll.  

Drizzle with a little olive oil and get it in the oven at 400.

In the pan that was vacated by the colors, melt a whole stick of butter.

Add the shrimps.  Cook for about 8-10 minutes over medium high heat flipping once for justice.  

Chop some tomato.

Take up the shrimp into a large bowl.  

Save a small amount of the liquid from the pasta pot and then strain the noodles.  

Your bread should be sitting pretty in that oven.  

Return your colors to the pan over medium heat.  Add the tomato and minced garlic.  Cook for about 5 minutes until good and heated through.  

Slice some lemon and garnish them lonely shrimps in the bowl.  

Add the pasta to the veggies...along with the extra liquid that you set aside.  

Toss.  You Tosser.  

Take the bread out of the oven and rub it down with the leftover garlic chunks.   

It will melt slowly as you rub it over the bread.  This is far superior to any garlic bread you have ever eaten.  

When you are done tossing the pasta/veggies and they are evenly distributed...pour into a large serving bowl.  Top with your freshly grated Parmesan or Romano.  Remember when I told you to grate some cheese off of the cheese block?  Well I did.  

Chop some fresh basil and add to the top of the pasta.  

Plate up.  Done son. 

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Swedish Meatballs

I'd often eat swedish meatball TV dinners as a kid...cause ya know...parents of the year and whatnot.  I'd never made it from scratch before and my roommate was craving balls so here it comes.  

I made a double recipe but heres what you'll need:

For the meatballs
1 lb of mixed ground beef and ground pork
1/2 cup Italian breadcrumbs
1 egg
1 small onion
2 cloves garlic
1/2 cup worcestershire sauce
Salt and pepper
Fresh chopped parsley for garnish

For the sauce
3 cups milk
2 tbsp flour
2 tbsp butter
1 1/2 cups beef broth
Salt and pepper

You'll need a large mixing bowl and a cutting board. Chop the onion into small pieces and mince the garlic cloves.   

Whisk an egg.  I could have done this in the big mixing bowl.  But I love doing dishes.  

Measure out your breadcrumbs with your sexy sexy hands.  Then pour those, the egg, the onion, garlic, and worcestershire sauce all into the mixing bowl.  

Add in a tablespoon of freshly ground salt and pepper. Buy the grinders in the spice section of your local grocery as opposed to the already ground.  It's worth the difference in price.  

Get your meat and there and let your sous chef go to town.  Tell him to make some sounds like a boot stuck in mud only wetter.  

When you've got a big wad and everything is mixed evenly, you are ready to start pinching off balls.  

Fill up the pan and get them frying on high heat for the first 7-10 minutes.  You want them to brown all the way around.  Turn often and with enthusiasm.  

Put your egg noodles on to boil with a little olive oil and salt in the water.  Lower the heat on your meatballs and cook for another ten minutes turning often.  

Remove the meatballs from the frying pan.  Prepare to make gravy.  

The recipe calls for beef broth...you can either make your own with beef bouillon cubes or buy it in the can.  

If you are using bouillon cubes you'll need to prepare the broth in a separate pan.  

Combine the flour and butter with the grease left in the pan from the meatballs.   

Stir in the milk and broth.  Whisk until smooth.  

Cook on medium-high heat for a few minutes.  Look confident as your stir.  Cooking, like anything else in life, is 10 percent what you say or do, 90 percent how you like while doing it.  Roomie nailed it.  

After the gravy has boiled for a couple of minutes season with additional salt and pepper if necessary.  Add the meatballs back to the pan.  

Let the meatballs sit in the sauce and think about what they did. For about 3-5 minutes on medium heat. 

Take your noodles up, dump on the meatballs and sauce and garnish with finely chopped parsley.  Pound your intestines.  

Monday, March 4, 2013

Crockpot Lasagna

Lasagna can be a pain in the ass.  But not with this recipe.  Its delicious, it will cook all day when you are at work...and when you get home your whole place will smell like your girlfriend after she gets off her shift at the Olive Garden.

This is stupid simple.  I recommend making the meat/sauce mixture the night before and refrigerate it.  

Here's what you need:

1-2 pounds of hamburger meat
1 onion
2 tbls of minced garlic
6 oz tomato paste
1 28oz can of tomato sauce
1 tbls dried oregano
4 cups of mozzarella cheese
12 oz cottage cheese
6 oz of parmesan cheese
1 package of dried lasagna noodles

There isn't a lot of prep.  Chop the onion into small peices.  

Brown yo beef in a skillet with the onion for ten minutes. 


Drain the liquid out and add the garlic and oregano and cook for another 3 minutes. 

Mix all the cheeses together in a big bowl.  

Add the tomato sauce and tomato paste to the meat.  

In the crock pot, make a layer of the noodles.  I had to snap some of them into weird shapes to get them to fit.  Get creative with it.  Get the kids involved  Shit I don't care just make it happen.  

Pour in a layer of the meat sauce on top of the noodles.  

Then a layer of the cheese.  Repeat until you are out of ingredients.  Just make sure that the top layer is cheese...for presentation's sake.  

Put it on low ...  6-8 hour mode.  Go to work.  Come home.  Stuff yer face with this bliss.

Done and done.