Oven Roasted Pork Loin

This recipe is super simple and doesn't take much time to prep.  There's two great things about these pork loins.  They go on sale every other week for $1.99 a pound...and even if you aren't a fan of these particular ingredients in this recipe, there are so many simple 4-8 ingredient combos you can use... it will get you in the kitchen trying some things out and it's near impossible to F up.  Here we go.

All you need is your loin, honey, brown sugar, apple cider vinegar, dijon mustard and paprika.  Sweet and pork go together like cocaine and waffles.  And the vinegar and mustard bring together the sweet with the tangy.  Boom.

4 Tbls   Honey

2 Tbls   Apple cider Vinegar

4 Tbls   Dijon Mustard

3 Tbls   Brown Sugar

1/2 Tsp Paprika

Get a small container to mix your ingredients.

In goes the honey, vinegar, mustard, brown sugar and paprika.  I like to use a little more paprika than the recipe calls for. And if you are cooking a big girl...4-5 pounds you can double the recipe above.  

Now mix it all together.  Get your loin in a baking pan...fatty side up.  

And baste on a layer of the sauce.  Leave plenty in the bowl because you are going to take it out and re-baste a couple of times while cooking.  

Into the oven at 350.  Follow the directions on the packaging for how long...generally pork is about 30 minutes per pound.  Mine was around 4 lbs so I left it in for about 2 hours.

Re-baste with the sauce a couple of times during cooking.  

 Take her out when the juices are running clear and let her sit for 5-10 minutes. Then slice, plate, and demolish it.  

Enjoy.

Buffalo Chicken and Potato Bake

Here comes a buffalo chicken and potato bake that will drop your hunger.  Like it's hot. This recipe has a fair amount of prep work but the cooking is easy.

Gather your ingredients…

• 2 lbs boneless, skinless chicken breasts, cut into 1/2-inch cubes
• 8-10 medium potatoes, cut into 1/2-inch cubes  (I leave the skin on)
• 1/3 cup olive oil 
• 1 1/2 tsp. salt
• 1 TBS. freshly ground pepper
• 1 TBS. paprika 
• 2 TBS. garlic powder 
• 6 TBS. hot sauce 

Topping:

• 2 c. Fiesta Blend Cheese or a mix of Cheddar & Monterey Jack
• 1 c. crumbled bacon 
• 1 c diced green onion

Preheat the oven to 500 degrees.  Crazy hot, I know.  Wash the potatoes and cube them up real nice.  Leave the skins on…they will get nice in crispy in the oven.

Get all of your seasonings in a big mixing bowl with the olive oil and hot sauce...dump your potatoes in and give them a nice spray tan orange coating.  

As you can tell from the pictures below...I put the potatoes in first then all the seasonings.  That was really, incredibly stupid and I'll regret it for the rest of my life.  Don't do that.  

Then get them into a pan and into the oven...leave as much of the sauce behind in the mixing bowl as possible. 

Wash and cube your boneless skinless chicken breasts...I used a little dark as well.   Then get them chickens in the mixing bowl and coat them too. Add more of the same seasoning mix if you'd like.   

Also dice your bacon and green onions in with the chicken.

The recipe calls for cheddar or colby jack cheese…but I like bleu cheese with my buffalo chicken so I used mostly bleu with a little bit of cheddar.  And I didn't have any shredded cheddar so I tore up some cheddar slices.  WT...I know.  This would also be a good time to add some ranch dressing in there if you wanted...I rolled sans ranch.  

When the potatoes have been in for 45 minutes, pour the chicken-cheese-bacon-onion mixture on top and put it back in the oven for another 15 minutes (longer if you used bone pieces of chicken).  Reduce the heat to 400.  

(no picture for this... my photog lost interest apparently)

Put yourself a side in the microwave…a can of beans, bag of broccoli and cheese…whatever gets it done for you.  This loaded chicken bake isn't the healthiest so probably something green would be good.  Your heart will hate you a little less.  

Pull that crap out and eat it like a champ.  Simple, cheap, delicious.  Boom. 

West African Chicken Stew

So after a brief hiatus...I'm out of the apartment and into my new home...with some upgraded gear...and rocketing back into the blogosphere with .... West African Chicken Stew.  My analytics tell me that no one from Africa is actually looking at my blog...but then again they probably don't have computers
over there.

So who wants AIDS?  Well go somewhere else...because this stew won't give you any.  No Malaria neither.  Here's what you'll need:

2 lbs of chicken...I used a combination of boneless skinless breasts and thighs

1 onion

1 sweet potato

1 28oz can of crushed tomatoes

1 tbs of tomato paste

1 can of white beans

1 can of corn

1/4 cup of peanut butter

2 cloves of garlic

1 tsp salt

1 tsp chili pepper

1/2 tsp cayenne pepper

1/2 tsp ginger

1-2 tbs oil

Wash and cut up your chicken however you'd like.  I removed most of the skin and fat from the thighs but left a little for flavor.

Get the chicken into a pan with the oil over medium heat and let it fry until it is no longer pink.

While that's going, check your yard for a supply drop from UNICEF containing your veggies.  Not there? Ok, well thats pretty much just like Africa too.  Make sure there are no warlords on your property stealing your supplies.

Peel and cube the sweet potato.  I also used a couple of yukon gold potatoes.  I peeled and minced the ginger...it stayed pretty crunchy in the final product...I'd recommend smashing it into more of a paste if you are using fresh.  

Then peel and chop your onion and garlic.     

Open your canned veggies with a sharp rock or stick.  Pour them into your big soup pot and add the rest of the veggies, seasonings, and the peanut butter.

Put the chicken in and bring it to a boil. Then reduce the heat to a simmer for about 30-45 minutes.  Voila.  Your stew is done.  Share it with your tribe.  Refrigerate or freeze the leftovers.

Arty Farty Museum Party

So I recently took a trip to Chicago and photographed a bunch of "art" at the Art Institute of Chicago.  Since I think I'm so funny, I decided to add comments and share with the world.  You're welcome.  

Seriously?  That Kimono is sooooo Tokugawa period...

First Japanese boy band.

Tsingtao beer bottle openers.  

Yes, I know it's November, not Movember.  You guys just aren't getting this...  

...I should've gone to the Indian Casino...

Like peanut butter and jelly. Like milk and cereal.  Like vaginas and cow skulls.  

The crowd patiently waits for the Hurricane Harbor staff to turn the wave pool back on.  

The sign says Jesus and John the Baptist...but I'd like to hear the double rainbow guy's take.

I don't think the new bartender knows how to make a cherry vodka sour...

I just know I went over my data usage this month.  By a lot.  

Cap your own here folks.  

The End.

Fun with Skin Cancer Part 2!

So the fun thing about skin cancer is...there are so many interesting ways to treat it!  You'll never get bored with how they F with your epidermis!  

This looks like a good time right?  A one man rave complete with blue light and goggles?

Well they put a chemical on your face and then you sit for an hour in the waiting room.  How do you pre-game for a one man blue light rave?  The world is your oyster my friend.  Do whatever you want. I think I read a book and regretted all my life decisions.  

Then they sit you in front of the blue light for 16 minutes and 40 seconds.  Exactly.  Science has told us that that is the exact right number of time to sit in front of the light.  If you believe in Science.  I'm still on the fence.  

It pretty much burns the shit out of you...and you're feeling it in the first 35 seconds or so.  Your skin is screaming bloody murder pain shrieks.  Some people pass out.  Some people mess themselves.  Some people just sit there.  I just sat there.  And then later I looked like this!

( The red spots are the pre-cancers.  The facial hair I have no excuse for.  8 years strong now )

So the first of these treatments wrecked shop real good.  First it blistered.  Then I got some weird red spots.  And just a general shade of red seared into my face.  Then I peeled.  And peeled.

It's not just a cosmetic inconvenience either.  After doing a treatment you can't go into the sun for 48 hours...or the chemical will reactivate and continue to burn your face.  And if you get a reaction like I did then you probably aren't going to go into the sun for....ever.  I write this from a cave 2,000 feet below the Earth's surface.  The second treatment wasn't so bad.  Probably because the first one was.  

( This guy nose cancer! )

After I was done peeling I did get a lot of compliments on how good my skin looked.  I guess thats what happens when you lose 5 or so layers of epidermis.  You look smooth as a baby's behind.

So wear your sun screen folks.  Seriously.